Dave's journal entry #2 Ghana

Day 2 April 23, 2010 (Day 2)

We arrive at 7:20am in ACCRA.

It is 12:20am PST but we aren’t focusing on that. 21hrs ago we rolled out of bed in our hotel at Sea-Tac and began this journey.
We made it thru immigration without a hitch and found our ride holding the sign Mr Dave Blaske. They helped us to their hotel shuttle, along with numerous Ghanian “helpers” that they did not chase away.
These “helpers” are very friendly and make small talk with you as we walk to the shuttle van.

As we walk I see that there is not one and then two but 5 of them at least by the time we got to the shuttle and I only had 4 bags!!! I wasn’t sure who was with the hotel and who wasn’t.
I knew they were helping and going to want a tip.

This is my least favorite part of Ghana, I feel bad inside but also know they are swindling some also, they are just very friendly. I stepped aside to find some small bills.
I handed one man a $5 and without blinking he says oh give me 20 and then each of us have 5.
I said no that is what I have to give you.
They left without incident, though he did ask again but off he/they went.
I still didn’t like the feeling I had inside, knowing that I have much but I also knew it was fair even though had they asked I would have declined there help as I already had 2 gentlemen from the hotel and myself and Tanner to handle our bags.
Its always an Adventure getting out of the airport unescorted as a foreigner.

As we await the volunteer from the orphanage to arrive we/I unpacked and read thru the information my lovely (but missing travel agent) Carrie had prepared.

I began to get a bit anxious because I did not have any Ghanian funds yet, nor did I have a way to get food or water…yes I was fretting a bit, had the jitters and was quite irritable (ask Tanner)

The volunteer arrives promptly and we began our short walk to Beacon House.
Ahh now the thoughts that race thru your mind, I thought; will he run into my arms, will he smile, will he be sad, excited nervous etc.
One of the volunteers tells me they told him we were coming the day before.
They don’t want to tell them too early as it can be very difficult.

He has known we were going to adopt him for several months but as the adoption process goes you don’t want to get the childs hopes up and then have them dashed.

We anxiously await in the office…and then I hear them coming. The door opens and he slowly walks up to me and VERY quietly says "hi dad" I think it was very soft and meek).

I have to admit I was a bit caught off guard by his meekness, as I was prepared for an excited, exuberant boy.

Of course that’s what I wanted too but I believe God used this moment to help remind me of HOW BIG OF A CHANGE THIS IS IN HIS LIFE. He is leaving EVERYTHING HE KNOWS TO BE GOOD and SAFE!

Yes he wants a family and YES he is excited to go to America and YES he smiled. I smiled at him and gave him a hug, wasn’t sure if I was getting a hug back but that was OKAY I was here and knew that God was breaking in.

We talked for a couple minutes (actually probably 30 seconds) I don’t do well in uncomfortable silences . I introduced him to Tanner, he was still very meek.

As I have watched the video of this here at the hotel I am recalling the depth that is in his eyes! God has a plan for this boy!
Its as though he has been waiting a long time for something (us to arrive) but at the same time you can see he perhaps is ALSO processing that he will be leaving soon as well!
He bites his lip as if to hold back his emotions but presses on and into the situation of us being there in front of him. I asked him if he would like to see some videos of John and Victoria back home. He said yes!

So we watched these and let the “ice break” for awhile. After watching the videos, Gabriel asked if he could go and get his family picture book. I said sure. Off he went and back he came with EVERY picture we had sent him.

We looked thru them all and then he put it in my backpack to be sure it went with us.
Not sure but I think he wanted to double check that I was indeed the man in his picture book!!! LOL.

He was now talking in more understandable volume, questions were flowing, when will we go to America, he was naming his brothers and sisters etc. He went in and out for a bit, NOTE I AM EXHAUSTED, every time he went out I had to catch myself from nodding off.

He came back and thanks to one of the volunteers we had some card games (UNO) and a memory matching game to play and just hang out a bit with. I will post a video of this because the laughing and giggling that occurred warmed my heart and also confirmed to me he was getting more comfortable.

I know many peoples adoption “first meets” are not always easy and even awkward, the family wants so much for it to be as they have dreamt of and played out in their minds eye over and over and yet often times they don’t play out exactly as we have played them out in our minds.

This I know whether as you thought they would be or quite a bit different, they are perfect none the less!

Ours was no different..JUST PERFECT!

It was time for lunch and for me that meant trying to deal with my anxiety about the money, food and my lack of rest!!! What a wimp but being honest!
We went and exchanged some money and I went back to the hotel to try and catch a nap before returning to the Orphanage.
Tanner stayed with the volunteers. I went back to the hotel and battled, yes battled. I was so cooked, if I could find a way to skip the next few days and get on a plane with Gabriel and Tanner in a few hours and just get back to my comfort in America that would be just fine.

I had anxiety, the jitters, I was SEVERELY MISSING my wife and tour guide who on our last journey was here ahead of me so she had it all figured out when I arrived.

I tried to sleep but really couldn’t as the jitters were increasing.
I prayed and tried to focus but I was really feeling like I was losing it. I wish I could say that it left right away but it didn’t.
I continued to pray and speak that He is my refuge and my strength, I knew that I couldn’t get thru all that this trip had to offer without Him carrying me.
Oh and I hadn’t mentioned,…. no phone, no internet so I couldn’t express any of this with Carrie. UGH!
I got up as it was time to head back still feeling anxious and jittery. I drank some water and began the walk back to Beacon House on the red dirt roads, speaking God you are my REFUGE and MY STRENGTH, over and over.
As I walked I began to feel a bit better, no jitters, anxiety leaving…okay thanks God not completely gone but much much better.

I got to the orphanage and met with the Director who gave me all the information and paperwork I would need for my return trip in a few days. She invited us out for dinner (whew, one less thing to navigate while I was exhausted.)
Tanner played and played with the kids and crashed when we got back to the hotel. We went out for pizza (real Ghanian huh but when you can feel the blood flowing and it feels like THICK MUD my body and mind says to me no more adventure! I know, what a wimp!

We retired for the evening and some MUCH needed rest. Tanner slept for 13hrs straight, me I slept for an hour and then was awake for 4, wide awake, then thankfully my body slept very soundly for 7 hours.

Whew a VERY BIG DAY and a VERY LONG JOURNAL, but it was GOOD. NOTE I am writing this at the end of the next day so my hindsight is of course helping my perspective/reflection too…

Thank you Lord for being my REFUGE and MY STRENGTH!

Daves Journal entry #1

Hello everyone...Dave is in Ghana and has put this note on his Face Book page...I thought i would copy it here for those of you non-Face Bookers :O)

At this time the internet is a bit slow, but he was able to finally get it to work on his computer today. Our family got to Skype with him after he had been in Ghana for 24 hours with no communication with us:O) (Romana got a good laugh at me as I kept texting her to check up on them...it was all I could do to, not know how the "first meeting" with Gabriel went. More on that to come in next post. Until then...time for Dave to be the Blogger! Go Dave GO!!!

Great Adventure Part II

(Our Trip to Ghana April 2010)

April 22, 2010

Day 1 (Departure)
Tanner and I make the trek to the airport 3am :-).
Tanner is doing great. After a long wait to get checked in we get to the gate have a breakfast sandwich and finally board our first leg of the journey.

We arrive in NY and make it to our next leg of the journey with relative ease.

It is here in NYC that I am again hit with a wave of emotion (just like the last time just over 2 years ago). As sit amongst many many beautiful Africans I am reminded again of the journey and commitment to this little boys life I/we are making.

That is not to say I/we haven’t made the decision to adopt with great reflection, processing and of course some leaps of faith but God has used this point in my journey each time to “bring it all home”.
I had forgotten he did that last time with John and Victoria but I remembered here when I sat at the gate awaiting to board the plane to Accra.
This time I am not heading off to join my beautiful wife (more on that later), but instead am embarking on this journey with Tanner our 15 year old boy.
Tanner is giddy and it is awesome to see how polite and how he displays a servants heart on the plane helping people load bags etc. I must remember these moments when I can’t get him to wash up or put clean clothes on!! LOL.

The 1st day ends somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean or over the West Coast of Africa, depending on which time zone, PST, EST or Ghanian you are counting from.

"It's Time Mama"

A dear Beacon House adoptive mama of two great BH kiddos took this picture of Gabriel some weeks ago. She was there to go and get her son and bring him home. She graciously took over a small soccer watch and a letter from us to give to Gabe.
What I did not know until TODAY...was that she took this sweet picture of him and his watch.

TODAY, after a very long and emotional two weeks with new Embassy news and process of investigations, I was able to call my friend and say...."Got it Got it Got it"
"it" being a visa interview for Gabriel!

It was a GREAT DAY! It was a day of shouting God's glory to ALL I came into contact with!
So I shouted to this dear friend...a few seconds after we got off the phone...onto my phone popped this watch pic of my baby...and the caption said "Its time Mama"

TEARS!
Tears of JOY, release tears of stress from the last few weeks of uncertainty, and tears of a friend who knowingly held a BLESSING for me until just the right time!

TODAY WAS THE RIGHT TIME!

Gabey-Baby...and his throwing back of his head SMILE says it all! It is time and we are sooooo excited to go and get him! (we meaning Dave and Tanner are going and WE are all counting the days!)

Let me jump back to this Wednesday when ALL things pointed to Dave having to cancel the trip and WAIT while Embassy stuff fell into place....I wrote this in my journal this Wednesday as I pondered, processed and PRAYED!


"I was reminded by God this past Wednesday morning about Moses when He went up the mountain to get the ten commandments, while he was gone the people set up altars and made idols.

Holy spirit said to me " I am doing something good up on the mountain Carrie, WAIT for me....don't give anything at the alter of fear, anxiety or stress! ...You will like what I am bringing down for you!" So, I am holding on to that!"

For the record....I REALLY LIKE WHAT HE BROUGHT DOWN THE MOUNTAIN FOR ME!

"It's Time GABRIEL BLASKE....here we come!"

Attachment

Attachment, attachment, attachment....the buzz word of adoption!



In the big wide world of adoption, the word attachment is connected to most conversations in some way.
For me personally, answering the most frequently asked question of "how are the kids adjusting and attaching" is often answered with a smile and the words....."we are on a great journey, each day is a new discovery"

Attachment at the Blaske house has not been looked at as an item on a check list to be checked off...For example: "work on attachment"...CHECK, done...
Nope, it is the ebb and flow of discovery of all of our lives, stories and life situations blending, clashing, melding and connecting day by day for the rest of our lives.

Are we closer in some areas now then we were on that super "gottcha day" March 2008..YES!

In looking back at the almost two years of having J and V home, I can see a pattern of "attachment opportunities" woven into the fabric of our family.

It looks something like this:

CHANGE ='s re-checking SECURITY

~Dave has to work late a few nights in a row....schedule changes

??? Mom, did Daddy give you that wedding ring????

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Ashlie moves to her own house in town

???Mom, did Daddy kiss you on your meeting day???

(J calls our wedding our "meeting day")

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~I get sick and go to hospital for a day

???Daddy, did mommy wear that long dress at the wedding???

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Brock gets a job after school and starts coming home after the kids are in bed

???Mom do you get to do your wedding day again???

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

over and over and over and over and over and over

the "wedding/marriage" questions get asked.

Looking back at our two years, these questions get asked at times of change,

and when security in some form is in question!

A few weeks ago, Dave was at a meeting, Brock was at work, Tanner and Tristan were at church and Gabriels passport had come in....CELEBRATION!

I was not even feeling the ground under my feet, I was sooooo excited about the passport. There had been a buzz around the house all day!

In the evening while everyone was gone and doing their thing, J, V and I were snuggled on my bed reading before bed.

We finished the book, prayed and were getting up off the bed when the questions started.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What was your meeting day like mommy?"

"Did Daddy kiss you, do you kiss anyone else"

"where is your dress?"

Ahhhhh ha!

I jumped out of bed, went into my closet, climbed up got my wedding dress box down

and

OPENED IT,

It Swooshed out of the box as we all watched the train float across my floor!

GASPS

GIGGLES

LAUGHTER

MORE LAUGHTER and SQUEALS

from J and V as they rolled around on my bed!

I said, V, do you want to put my dress on?

"Y E S MOM!!!" (through LOUD laughter)

Down she hopped out of my bed, and in a moment she had stepped into my dress got zipped up and stood looking with HUGE eyes at me...

"mom it is soooo heavy and so pretty!" and out we marched to the front room where the full length mirror was. Twirling, swirling, giggling she stood staring at herself.

J, what was J doing...WIDE eyed he was attached to my RIGHT leg like a Velcro child, smiling from ear to ear!

How many times have the "wedding / marriage" questions been asked over the last two years? I do not think I can count.

How many more will be asked?

I do not know...but I do know that change brings up the need to check

and re-check and re-check SECURITY...

What could be MORE SECURE for a child than a healthy, happy SECURE marriage!

Who would of known that my special kiss, my beautiful ring, my trailing veil and fantastic dress would be a topic of monthly, weekly and sometimes daily conversation almost 17 years after I said "I DO".....

P A S S P O R T

Can I say....."PASSPORT!"

January...WOW, what a MONTH!

In a God size SUPER NATURAL way...January wraps up as being one of the hardest spiritual, emotional and physical battles our family has had since the start of Gabriels journey.

So many people prayed! So many people felt such a DARKness pressing in all around us in Jan.

Jan 27th, one by one the phone calls started coming in.

• "Carrie and Dave, we really feel like something has lifted"
• "Carrie, the urgency to pray has ceased"
• "Carrie and Dave, we have been feeling like we needed to cover you...that feeling does not seem as urgent"

*these were different circles of people, friends, family, adoptive friends, people from other states all pressing in to the throne room on our behalf....all having the same feelings.

God does amaze me!

Also I am blessed to have a circle of people who will listen to the Holy Spirit on our behalf.

Adoption is warfare...so glad we are equipped to FIGHT and do not have to do so on our own power.

FEBRUARY 1, 2010 NEW month, NEW day, NEW news...

Phone call comes from Ghana "Carrie guess what I have in my hand?"

P A S S P O R T

Then some of my favorite words I get to hear from the Director at Beacon House....

"Oh yes, oh YES"

As different families have walked this passport journey in the last few years...each family's adoption journey is soooooo different, but pretty much across the board...PASSPORTS tend to be the section of the adoption process that is very dificult.

The ride is like no other!

Each Beacon House family that I have been able to call and say "your PASSPORT is in" ....has been a JOYFILLED celebration when it is IN the HAND and correct!

I have been able to joyfully celebrate with many families!

One thing I know for sure in the last 2 years of doing the Volunteer BH coordinator job:

...when it is time for a child, who does not have a forever family,

to come home to forever family...a family who will lead them in the way everlasting through the powerful perfect love of Jesus...

The enemy FIGHTS!

Passports coming out seem to be a good target for sure!!

We stand in a position of victory and do not have to fight for victory...even when we can not see the how and why...GOD IS IN CONTROL!

Today we celebrate the PASSPORT....the tireless efforts of the BH Director and staff,

the ALL POWERFUL personal GOD who holds it all in His hands and lets us come along for the RIDE OF A LIFE time if we trust, believe and love HIM only!

I 600 approval, Visa and TRAVEL coming NEXT....will keep you updated!

*the passport on the top is the cover of John's passport...Gabriels is safely still in Ghana awaiting his VIsa / exit!

Daughter!

The Love of this mommy heart is FULL,

by the KIND and GOD FILLED words of my amazing oldest daughter.

Her view of our family story is on her blog....well said sweetheart!

http://www.aarghistheperfectword.blogspot.com/

We are all praying and thankful for God's PLAN for all of our lives!

"Through the intimacy of our relationship, you are being transformed from the inside out.

As you keep your focus on Me, I form you into the one I desire you to be.

Your part is to yield to My creative work in you, neither resisting it nor trying to speed it up.

Enjoy the tempo of a God-breathed life by letting Me set the pace. Hold My hand in child-like trust, and the way before you will open up step by step."

"Jesus Calling Devotional" Jan 25th

Gabriel Blaske

Dear Jesus,
Tonight I sit and look at this sweet tender warrior you have so carefully fashioned by your hand, and I am in awe of Your POWER and LOVE!

THANK YOU for his LIFE!

I PRAISE YOU for all the workers at his first place of care, that cared for him

I DELIGHT that you connected him to BH, put him in the hands of those who speak LIFE........TRUE LIFE to his sweet lil life each day from your word....feed him, teach him, cloth him, show him what PLAY is....and seek out a forever family for him.

US

Really...it is US! How can that be? How can hearts get connected that are so many miles and oceans apart! Lord I PRAISE YOU for what YOU have done and continue to do!

HOME

There comes a time in the adoption journey where the Spiritual realm knows that there is a HOME for a child...and that progress is getting made to the HOME-COMING.

What was a fight is now an all out war...papers disappear, computers crash, backs get injured, trucks get crashed, family members get sick, sink pipes break and leak all over the floors, process gets back logged...........one waiting child starts to lose hope as his lil child like heart and mind does not understand "time and process" sees the hope start to slip through his grasp of understanding.

C O N F I D E N C E

Dear Gabriel, SON.....from the moment we first saw you in Jan 2008....as we watched your littleness skip around the play area and on the trampoline...we knew you were a very

"sweet" boy.

Many families who have come to BH come out saying

"we are praying for a family for sweet Gabriel"

We prayed for you since then...and being C O N F I D E N T that GOD had begun a good work in you...He chose us to be a part of that work.

WE ARE BLESSED TO CALL YOU SON, for you are a GIFT and already soooooo loved!

Sweet boy....hang on to the WORD of the ONE who created you.

Philippians 1:6 is a life verse for you.

I pray this prayer for you as we draw our swords and hold up our shields and fight well to the finish for you! The finish is not your home coming, but to see you grow in the design God set out for you...the PLANS that He has already started....and will complete.

We are just thankful that we get to be a part of seeing how God does it all,

and BE THE ONES Who's ARMS YOU CAN SNUGGLE UP INTO no matter how old you are.

Sweet boy....the concept of mommy is new to you, and son, I can not wait to play that out each day with you as you!

THANK YOU LORD FOR HIS SW REPORT, PASSPORT, VISA, and TRAVEL to his HOME!

(We know that You know, we NEED these four things and we are confident that you will complete it)

With LOVE....